The gospel appointed for today is John 13:21-32. Two things in this text fascinate me. First that the gospel writer states “Jesus was troubled in spirit.” It’s something of an anomaly for John, because throughout the gospel Jesus is well aware of what is going to happen to him. For example, in chapter 12, Jesus says, “And what should I pray? Father, save me from this hour? No, it is for this reason that I have come to this hour.” It seems almost as if it is John’s direct contradiction of the scene in Gethsemane in the Synoptic gospels, where Jesus prays that “this cup may be taken from me.”

The second interesting thing is Judas. We are fascinated with him, we want to understand why he betrayed Jesus. That attempt to figure Judas out is present already in the gospels. We see it hear, with the reference to Satan entering him. But we may be misdirecting our focus.

This takes place at the Last Supper, just after Jesus has washed his disciples’ feet, including the feet of Judas, and after he explained his actions as a model of servanthood for his disciples to imitate. Chapter 13 begins, “Having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end.” What may matter most about Judas is that Jesus loved him, modeled that love in service, and invited him to participate in a life of loving service.